Where I am now

I feel like I'm high. Everyone I meet is perfect, I suddenly have the best friends in the universe and my bed smells amazing. The grass is so green, the sky is so blue and my legs look so skinny. The cigarettes don't really burn my lungs and the beers don't give me a hangover. Everyone is pretty, everything is beautiful. I'm in love with life. The world is better than any pill I've ever taken.
 
I thought I wasn't able to feel like this anymore. I thought I fucked up so bad, that my only solution would be antidepressants for the rest of my life, and getting used to that certain sense of melancoly. Who knew all I needed was a lifeplan, 10 therapy sessions, some parental love and quitting drugs? This is almost too good to be true. I'm probably not getting into any of the schools I applied to. It would all be way too fucking easy.
 
I'm proud of you, E. For listening to your heart. For giving youself the love you deserve. For letting go.

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